lame birthday video

this may be my lamest youtube yet

consider it a video version of my birthday post

imagine you were with me as i grew older in hollywood, way back on september 28th, 2008

how i spent my birthday

i already commented on turning 41 and how it's a rather dull number. i won't go into how i am trying to define my "crisis" as a "transition" and other navel-gazing mumbo jumbo

but i do think a blogger i recently discovered said it too, and better:

heading east on turning 41 check out his interesting blog and photos- his turning 40 post is good too...


went to the west hollywood book fair, oh- had a puppet show last night where i made up a cheer about jeffrey dahmer- i felt dirty afterwards. i also made a hot dug puppet, as mr. belvedere, hit on a minor at the craft services table... improv+booze+pupppets=depravity
bought these
this guy is the king of these women

later we went to jimmy kimmel's san gennaro italian festival in our neighborhood
what is this thing?





it reminded me of the st. anthony's italian festival i used to attend in wilmington when i was a lad... it was like being back on the east coast in the middle of hollywood... south philly with palm trees...

tom tells us tales of burning man

still becoming

Words cannot express, explain
My relationship with time and things done and undone
And how they feel in my gut in my chest behind my eyes
Children never to be born
Aging- trying to learn to outsmart existence itself, as I have always tried to do…
Still becoming, still

i will not be 40 for very much longer

every night I tell myself I am the cosmos...




this is my last week as a 40 year old.

the first 3/4 of my 40th year was easy-breezy

then I got hit with a lot of THINKING that I have tried to deal with mindfully

people tell me being sensitive and suffering (which I try to remind my self is optional) makes me who I am and all that, but man I could really use a break from this head of mine that I seem to have crammed up my ass

5 was a special birthday

16 was pretty good, with the driving...

21 I must have thought was going to be awesome but I was already drinking, so what's the big deal?

25 blew my little mind... that was my mid-life crisis, right there... just thought I'd get a head start

41... what's so special about 41? 40 is the top of the hill. 41 is what? the pregnant pause before the roller coaster starts the mad rush?

I hope to enjoy it all much more that I have been capable of as of yet.

Jung, man. It's all about the Jung.

she's gone all right- do you really wonder why?

maybe it's your sleeveless tux shirt, or your pissy glam buddy who can't be bothered to lip synch?




seriously- what is the story behind this?

if spike jonze shot something like this for kanye west today, they'd be buried in VMAs

my three buddhas

that's the grieving one, the meditating one, and the happy one

how can I be all three at once?