Sunday, December 26, 2004

I got my Jesus Puppet and watched The Star Wars Holiday Special


Christmas 2004!



What a fun Christmas.

I gave my atheist wife the perfect gift- the gift she truly wanted- NOTHING!

She got me my very own Jesus Puppet!

Then V (of Moon Man fame) came over and we watched

Oh

(Itchy mask in the Lucasfilm archives)


my

(We all live in a yellow Corellian Freighter...)



sweet

(Wasn't she that nice lady on Julia?)




Lord.

(Holographic dancer...nice beard)


I hadn't seen it since it originally aired in November, 1978. I remembered being thrilled by the animated sequence, and the look at Chewbacca's home life and family. But I also recalled a nagging sense of real suckery, and upon viewing it this year, I realize there must have been a lot that I simply blocked out. A lot of Harvey Korman, especially.


Harvey Korman as "Gormaanda". One of three characters he plays in The Star Wars Holiday Special. Unfortunately.

The Star Wars Holiday Special tells the story of Chewbacca's attempts to get home to his family (wife Mala, son Lumpy, father Itchy) on the Wookie planet in time for the Wookie holiday Life Day. All our heroes are there: Han, Luke, Leia, R2-D2, C-3PO, The Jefferson Starship.

Talking to my brother, he realized he was a college freshman that fall. I was in fifth grade. Man it really speeds up as you go, don't it? 1978 might as well be the moon.




Harrison Ford as a really mushy Han Solo. He gets all sentimental about the Wookies TWICE in this thing, sort of out of the blue. Something must have hardened him between this Life Day and the events in The Empire Strikes Back. Maybe it was that bounty hunter he ran into on Ord Mantel?



Galactic trader Art Carney helps Itchy the Wookie with the virtual-porn Mind Evaporator. This sequence is just bizarre- and it is hard to stand out as the bizarre sequence in the The Star Wars Holiday Special. There is no better way to describe what happens to Itchy as he watches Diahnn Carroll sing . The old Wookie gets off.



Surrendering the Pink...


Han and Lumpy.




Isn't that Jango Fett's boy? What's he doing helping that Skywalker kid?


Mark Hamill with eye shadow. A ton of it.


Did I force my family to watch this thing? Well I did this year! The wife was downright disturbed by it. (Read her take on watching The Star Wars Holiday Special over here at PatriotActors.) V laughed so hard he scared the kitten into goin' on the carpet. I don't know if viewing The Star Wars Holiday Special will become a holiday tradition, but I feel blessed to have seen it again.

Happy Life Day, Jesus Christ!

(Singing The Life Day Wrong - I mean SONG.)

Jesuspuppet!

The Star Wars Holiday Special links:
Leave it to Wikipedia to have a The Star Wars Holiday Special page. I love Wikipedia.
These folks will really show you around The Star Wars Holiday Special:
starwarsholidayspecial.com Pictures, audio clips- a really nice site. If there were an official The Star Wars Holiday Special site, this is what it would look like. CBS and Fox memos, press kits, the SCRIPT. What more could you want? A Jesus puppet, I'll bet.

Or an article from TheForce.net here
That one links to this terrific breakdown of The Star Wars Holiday Special, on a pro-wrestling fansite (?), WrestleCrap.





Some toys never get born... these are prototypes of action figures of Chewie's familiy, on a model of the groovy Frank Lloyd Wright/Marin County-style Wookie tree house they live in. (All their place needed was a BIG hot tub with an excellent drain trap. For the Wookie fur. )
(L-R- Chewbacca, Mala, Lumpy, and Itchy)



Will lightning strike twice? Shooting Han and Chewie in the Falcon for The Star Wars Holiday Special, The Burbank Studios, Burbank, Ca, @ September 1978.

Worst song ever. Really. I know- the expression "worst song ever" could be applied to a lot of songs. But this thing just makes you want to die.

I've just scratched the strange surface of this thing- Bea Arthur sings this Kurt Weill style beer hall song in the Mos Eisley cantina; Korman, that bastard, does an absolutely humorless robot skit then plays a guy that pours his drinks into a hole on the top of his head; Art Carney tries to do a vaudeville routine with an Imperial Stormtrooper Commander (ugh- if Jackie Gleason saw this thing he probably busted a gut larfing) and Carrie Fisher sings a song to the tune of the Star Wars theme.

It's the best thing ever. Happy Holidays.

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